Why You’re Not Motivated to Lose Weight
How many times have you become excited and motivated about a new eating plan or workout schedule, only to realize a few weeks later that you lost steam quickly and you’re now sitting on the couch, not working out, munching on a bag of potato chips?
Okay, so you may not relate exactly to the last part (pick your poison), but maybe you do.
In my work with clients, who often seek to lose weight or get in shape, I have discovered an interesting phenomenon, as it relates to use of the word, “motivated.”
People explain their struggles with staying “motivated,” and believe that they are too unfocused to stick to a healthy diet, cook healthy meals, or find the desire to exercise. My clients tell me they are lazy, make excuses, and that their priorities are out of line. They believe they struggle because of their character flaws or a lack of discipline.
As typical, it is my job to dig deeper and identify the root problem, to the problem described to me, by many, as “lack of motivation.”
In my investigative work as a nutritionist, I have noticed an undeniable correlation between those who say they are “unmotivated” to get healthy and clients who work full-time, raise children, own businesses, travel often, wear many hats, or all the above.
These clients, who are often women, feel overwhelmed, put themselves last, and may feel that they don’t deserve more. They spend so much time and energy on their work or businesses that they don’t prioritize their health. Their work and family, or other obligations, come first, and they are left with scraps for themselves.
They lack time, emotional energy, and financial resources.
Can you relate? If so, perhaps motivation to get healthy and lose weight is not your real problem…. Maybe, the motivation boost you really need is dedicated “me-time” (a.k.a. “you-time”).
Why “Me-Time” Matters
It wasn’t until my mid-20s, that I learned from a wise and dear counselor, that “If it’s good for you, it’s good for all.” Said another way, “You can’t take care of others, if you don’t take care of yourself.” Or in my own words, “If my load is too full, then it is going to overflow and make a mess.”
You likely did not get to where you are, feeling utterly overwhelmed and perhaps completely hopeless about the prospect of making healthy changes, by putting yourself anywhere but last, and it’s time to stop this bad habit. You may view your self-sacrifice as a benefit to the people in your life or a necessity to fulfill your responsibilities as a provider, but your service and provisions can only serve superficial needs, and the world also needs you to reach your potential and be the best version of yourself.
I can practically tell you that to lose weight or get in shape you need to make more time to plan meals, grocery shop, cook, and workout. However, if you feel unmotivated, overwhelmed, or too unfocused to take actions towards getting healthy, you first need to establish a daily habit of “me-time.”
You may believe that partaking in “me-time,” will cause you to drop the ball on your responsibilities and the people that depend on you-- but there is a happy medium, and your “me-time” is required to get there.
Why “Me-Time” Creates Balance
We are conditioned, as humans, to adapt and survive. When I was in college, raising a family, struggling beyond what you can probably imagine with hardships, obstacles, and regular emergencies that required my time and energy, I somehow managed to study and make straight As.
At the same time, I managed to act as an exceptional mother, work part-time, eat mostly healthy, keep a tidy home, and even spend a little time with friends.
I adopted the belief, that I must get through school and make straight As, but I still cared A LOT about being there for my family, taking care of my health, and providing, and I still wanted to keep my home life in order and socialize with my friends.
Many people told me I couldn’t do it, but I made my life what it needed to be to accomplish the things that mattered most to me.
If you trust that “me-time” deserves a place in your life and put “me-time” at the top of your priorities list, you will adapt, and naturally transform to balance the things that matter most in your life. You are human and you are meant to survive and thrive.
What Should “Me-Time” Include?
Daily “me-time” does not need to take up hours of your every day and, when I say “me-time,” I am not necessarily talking about time to veg out in front of your favorite Netflix series or get a spa pedicure.
I believe daily “me-time” should serve to replenish you and give energy and self-love back to yourself but, also, allow for you to experience your thoughts, explore your desires, and develop aspirations and action items.
Me time should include reflection
Reflection includes exploring thoughts about how you feel, what is important to you, recent events in your life, and circumstances that you may want to change.
Me time should include restoration
Restoration includes working through challenges, releasing negativity and things beyond your control, alleviating stress, and welcoming encouraging, hopeful, and positive energy into your life.
Me time should include intention
Intention includes deciding what actions you want to take now or in the future to accomplish things you want. It also includes deciding how to approach your day, a specific situation, or person.
For many people, exercise activities, such walking, hiking, running, or yoga, provide the perfect and preferred opportunity for “me-time,” because, if the person enjoys these activities, they allow for restoration with opportunity for reflection and intention.
Others might prefer journaling and exploring “me-time” through written thoughts and intentions. Others, still, might choose quiet meditation or prayer that doesn’t involve exercising or writing, but only focusing their mind.
You might be wondering why something like watching your favorite movie, going to the spa, playing a game of basketball, or “game-night” with friends doesn’t count as “me-time.” These activities can boost your relaxation and happiness, and you can classify them as restorative types of “me-time.”
However, because you want to make changes in your life (i.e. losing weight, getting in shape, or getting healthy), you also need to include “me-time” that allows you to get in touch with your deeper desires and set meaningful intentions.
Conclusion
So, maybe you agree that you are too bogged down, burdened, and overwhelmed to find the motivation to lose weight, get in shape, or get healthy.
Maybe you have neglected yourself for a long time or too often and “me-time” is the first step you will take towards making the motivation you struggle with possible.
Perhaps you are thinking, to yourself, “Okay, but what next? My lack of time is real. How will “me-time” solve it all?”
I specialize in helping people transform their food relationship, and “time,” is a common area that impacts the health of one’s relationship with food. If you know that time impacts your food relationship or you know that your food relationship needs work, you should take my free food relationship quiz as your next step!
My free quiz, “Are You in a “Good” or “Bad” Food Relationship,” tells you the health of your food relationship based on time and six other areas, I’ve identified, that impact your relationship with food.
After taking the free quiz, you’ll receive a food relationship score and customized results. You’ll also receive a bonus, “My Top Food Relationship Tips” PDF, where I share my best tips for improving your food relationship in all seven food relationship areas.
I hope that reading my blog post today helps you progress your food relationship forward so that you can live the healthy, happy, optimal life I know you desire.
